house
July-bye-why I am moving. I have not moved often in my life and I realize I am very lucky for that. It is a stressful endeavor to say the least. some thoughts:
true friendship is being REAL
true friendship is getting it done for yourself and others.
true friendship is consideration
living together transforms a friendship for better or worse.
"community" could easily replace friendship in these sentences.
being in community with others. means.... sacrificing your wants, and knowing it will pay off for the benefit of whole. taking care, holding another's hurt in your heart like it's yours. choosing words with consideration, and apologizing when you make mistakes. giving everything, knowing sometimes it will be for nothing. there is still this unknown thing in community that I can't capture. I want to know what its name is and what it tastes like.
everybody is me. and what that means...
how do you tread the line of grace and accountability? how do you give forgiveness to others without whittling the forgiveness for yourself away? I feel like the swallow swooping in endless circles. again and again and again looking and searching
for what I don't even know!
it's impossible to put into words how broken up I feel about not making art. I feel it slipping away and I need to catch the last few crumbs before it's all gone. the reality of the world grows heavy on me every day and I am trying to understand where my pencil on paper could even fit into that. somehow it feels related to this current internal struggle.
it is ok to step back when you feel yourself turning.
it is ok to take a moment, of breath, and silence. morning light peeking through. maybe its ok to be an animal too, protective and strong